Engineer

I'm posting something, which means probably one thing. Midterms are coming up! Gasp! I can't believe it's already 5th week. The quarter has been going ridiculously fast with Chem E problem sets being due like every other day admidts the oral reports, written reports, and other stuff that needs to be done. Needless to say, I've been busy. Boelter computer lounge (where I am right now) is my 2nd home, no joke. It's freezing in here by the way. I need to remind myself to bring a sweater even when it's hot outside.

I'm glancing at my homework that has the score 47/80 out on the top, but yet I'm not too disappointed, surprisingly. I've been refraining myself from going to TA office hours because I still feel and believe that getting spoon fed the solution causes me to lose my natural instincts and drive to actually learn the material. I want to be the best chemical engineer ever, which is a paradox because I'm doing things that are preventing me from getting the best grades possible (last minute finnese on hw sets, struggling and wasting time trying to figure stuff out), but it's all worth it. I see people who are getting the right answers but still have no clue on the natural setups and approaches to doing problems.

I think the long hours are finally paying off though. I've been reading alot more for classes (rewritting lecture notes, reading the book, doing hw set problems purely from scratch). Teh cool thing is even though I've been struggling with classes, things are coming together. My recent hw set that I turned in was done solely with instincts. I'm hoping that I get good enough with this heat transfer and thermochem stuff that I can eventually teach an ordinary person the theory behind it.

Valentine's day is coming up and I think i'm celebrating it with Passion Church peeps, which is always cool. I wonder if it is korean tradition to eat ja jang myun when you're single on valentine's day. IT sure seems strange, and my parents have no clue what I'm talking about when I mention about it. Nonetheless, I'm eating jajang myun (hopefully at Dragon, my favorite new korean-chinese restaurant) and get to actch up with people I haven't seen in a long time.

And if you didn't infer from the paragraph above, yes, I'm still single. I don't think I really care at this point to be honest. The only way I could realistically have a girlfriend if she was in Chemical Engineering, but I don't really find any Chem-E's attractive (note: sorry to any Chem-E's that are reading this). I guess my current status is "open, but not actively looking"

Times with God over the past month have been good. I've been much more mindful of Him and just commuting and praising Him throughout the course of the day. I do need to go into the word more though. Rock and I have been reading Deuteronomy for the past couple weeks, which initially was zzzz, but the book is starting to come alive.

Deuteronomy 6:20-26
20 In the future, when your son asks you, "What is the meaning of the stipulations, decrees and laws the LORD our God has commanded you?" 21 tell him: "We were slaves of Pharaoh in Egypt, but the LORD brought us out of Egypt with a mighty hand. 22 Before our eyes the LORD sent miraculous signs and wonders—great and terrible—upon Egypt and Pharaoh and his whole household. 23 But he brought us out from there to bring us in and give us the land that he promised on oath to our forefathers. 24 The LORD commanded us to obey all these decrees and to fear the LORD our God, so that we might always prosper and be kept alive, as is the case today. 25 And if we are careful to obey all this law before the LORD our God, as he has commanded us, that will be our righteousness."

I think for people who have encountered God and are Christians, they can reflect on the moments where God has rescued them out of what they used to be. I think this particular passage hits me alot because whenever I'm in a faith crisis moment in which I'm struggling with the thoughts of leaving God altogether, I'm always reminded of what God has delivered me from and what He has done in my life. Because of the past history with God, no matter how far I'm away, I can never abandon Him. Even as I read this passage, I'm reminded of my past, not because of the fact is painful, but because of the miracles of what God has done in mine.

I still remain faithful to the calling that God has for me. I don't know what that particularly looks like right now, but I'm ready.