Summer is at the 1/2 way point for us quarter system college students. I wonder what to do
July 30 - Organic Church Fellowship Meeting
Aug 1 - Beach
Aug 14 - End of SAT teaching/Great America
Aug 16 - Fly back to LA
Sept 12 - Birthday/Possible Vegas Trip???
I need people to fill this schedule
I'm going to be going back to LA, probably working part time, researching, and studying for the GREs. However, I would also like to take this free time over the summer to chill with you guys who I don't see often.
Goals for Sess C
- Get 3 hours of studying for GREs per day on weekdays, 4 hrs combined on weekends
- Catch up with at least 2-3 people per week
- Work part time 15-20 hrs and hopefully train people to become SSS
- Research successfully (nothing bad)
- Pray at least 1 hr day/lead corporate prayer at least 1-2 times per week
- Read 2 books of the bible per week
- Catch up on Smash with people. Improve on Tech Skill
- Somehow clean the apartment (I heard the living room and kitchen are pretty bad)
i'm also very open to suggestions
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Real encounters
Because of Jenn's request, I have decided to update my blog.
"Real" Encounters
I have been out of LA and back in Cupertino for nearly 2 months. I enjoy aspects of being in Cupertino as well as being in LA. For one thing, I am significantly less busy back at home. My schedule at the beginning of summer was
7:45am Wake up/Get Ready
8:30-12:30 SAT Teaching
12:30-12am Nothing
After a while, the free time bored me. I couldn't possibly pray for 10 hours straight to be realistic. I gradually decided to pick up running as well as read some books. On a side note, I like CS Lewis as an apologetics writer. He's very straightforward in his writing style and produces solid examples to help visualize and portray what he's arguing. Also, I am tutoring Chemistry on the side and running at night with one of my good friends. Needless to say, I've gotten pretty active. However, I do really miss my Passion Church friends. I miss the times I can go up to someone and worship/jam the night away. I miss the times when we would pray for hours on end, meeting God face to face. I realize that I miss the "real" encounters that I had with God.
Granted, I do have much daily conversation with my Daddy whether it is during my drives around Cupertino or when I have some good alone time at Peet's Coffee. For the most part, my spiritual life is kind of stagnant. I currently attend GrX with my siblings on Sunday. I do not mean to bash GrX because I do believe God's work is being done in that church. However, I leave every Sunday with much dissatisfaction. We have worship and we hear a sermon every week. I do like that they incorporate a 5 minute prayer time during the service, but I feel like I'm watching a show every time I am there. I learn a good moral and listen to some good music. Is the church supposed to be like this? What worries me is that the general American Christian population expects that this is what spirituality/Christianity/church is all about. Man, I miss meeting God in real moments. It strikes me that when I read in the Bible of people encountering Jesus or God how much people's lives change.
Moses's encounter with God at the burning bush, forever changed him from a simple man to a man that led a nation to freedom
Paul on his road to Damascus encounters Jesus/God and has his life change forever
Mary upon meeting Jesus has her life changed forever
These encounters are real. If I learned anything, it is that the God of today is the same as He is yesterday. I believe in a God that still has encounters with people today. I don't believe real encounters with Him are pertinent only to the Old Testament or to the times when Jesus still lived. With that in mind, I don't get why people don't have the mindset of wanting to encounter Him at church. Instead, we settle for less than what God wants to pour out by having programs and services that don't really do much, bluntly said. I miss the times when we would gather and pray with the expectation that we were going to encounter the real livng God. We would not stop praying until something happened. It was in those moments though that God would show up and amaze and transform us in many powerful ways. I wonder if my busy-ness and my priorities in my own life also prevent me from having those real encounters with God. My spiritual life feels dry, I need more of you Jesus.
"Real" Encounters
I have been out of LA and back in Cupertino for nearly 2 months. I enjoy aspects of being in Cupertino as well as being in LA. For one thing, I am significantly less busy back at home. My schedule at the beginning of summer was
7:45am Wake up/Get Ready
8:30-12:30 SAT Teaching
12:30-12am Nothing
After a while, the free time bored me. I couldn't possibly pray for 10 hours straight to be realistic. I gradually decided to pick up running as well as read some books. On a side note, I like CS Lewis as an apologetics writer. He's very straightforward in his writing style and produces solid examples to help visualize and portray what he's arguing. Also, I am tutoring Chemistry on the side and running at night with one of my good friends. Needless to say, I've gotten pretty active. However, I do really miss my Passion Church friends. I miss the times I can go up to someone and worship/jam the night away. I miss the times when we would pray for hours on end, meeting God face to face. I realize that I miss the "real" encounters that I had with God.
Granted, I do have much daily conversation with my Daddy whether it is during my drives around Cupertino or when I have some good alone time at Peet's Coffee. For the most part, my spiritual life is kind of stagnant. I currently attend GrX with my siblings on Sunday. I do not mean to bash GrX because I do believe God's work is being done in that church. However, I leave every Sunday with much dissatisfaction. We have worship and we hear a sermon every week. I do like that they incorporate a 5 minute prayer time during the service, but I feel like I'm watching a show every time I am there. I learn a good moral and listen to some good music. Is the church supposed to be like this? What worries me is that the general American Christian population expects that this is what spirituality/Christianity/church is all about. Man, I miss meeting God in real moments. It strikes me that when I read in the Bible of people encountering Jesus or God how much people's lives change.
Moses's encounter with God at the burning bush, forever changed him from a simple man to a man that led a nation to freedom
Paul on his road to Damascus encounters Jesus/God and has his life change forever
Mary upon meeting Jesus has her life changed forever
These encounters are real. If I learned anything, it is that the God of today is the same as He is yesterday. I believe in a God that still has encounters with people today. I don't believe real encounters with Him are pertinent only to the Old Testament or to the times when Jesus still lived. With that in mind, I don't get why people don't have the mindset of wanting to encounter Him at church. Instead, we settle for less than what God wants to pour out by having programs and services that don't really do much, bluntly said. I miss the times when we would gather and pray with the expectation that we were going to encounter the real livng God. We would not stop praying until something happened. It was in those moments though that God would show up and amaze and transform us in many powerful ways. I wonder if my busy-ness and my priorities in my own life also prevent me from having those real encounters with God. My spiritual life feels dry, I need more of you Jesus.
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Inadequacy and dating (in the PC context)
Sometimes I wonder in the midst of my brokenness, why me God? Why have you chosen to die for me? Why did you choose me to know so much about Your goodness and Your love? Why are you handing authority to me as Your hands and feet when You know my weaknesses and my sins? You know me in my low points, yet You want me to be a testimony of Your glory? How does that work, God? I’m confused.
In these moments, I ponder again and again why God moves the way he does. I picture God to be perfect and flawless. Once again, those are attributes of God. In these realizations, I do not want to taint or mess up anything about my perfect Father and King. Whether the task maybe doing ministry in church or trying to explain how awesome He is to people, I am worried and scared that I’m not the “right” person for the job and that I will screw up.
I grew up as a clutz. I remember the times when I would drop food everywhere and have people scream to me on how unreliable I was. I had people belittle me constantly saying that I did not hold up to some certain standard whether it was following in the footsteps of my brother or failing to meet expectations in general.
God’s funny sometimes. I have to constantly be reminded by Him that my failures are okay. In scripture, He says that He is actually made strong in my weakness and that we are a working masterpiece.
I write this to not get pity; rather I wonder if this mindset of inadequacy seeps into how we view members of the opposite sex within Passion Church (PC). Overall, I feel a strong sense of admiration towards everyone in PC. Never before have I seen a group of people who are so passionate for the Lord. I have learned much about many aspects of our Father through PC. With the women of PC, I have a strong sense of respect. They have valued the Lord so much in their life, choosing Him as their first love. I’m not saying that PC people are perfect, but they sure are amazing.
Anyway, I wonder if when a person does have feelings of love/romance towards the other gender, then feelings of inadequacy come in, preventing a person from pursuing his or her crush.
“I want to date her, but I’m not good enough”
Okay, maybe a person might not outright say that. Let’s change it
“I want to date her, but I’m not ready to date her. Her priority is with God. I do not want to screw up her relationship with God. She is so awesome and talented too, but I’m worried that I might distract her from her relationship with God.”
This is more subtly said in the minds of PC people (in my opinion). I think one of the reasons people don’t want to date is because of the fear that they are not good enough for their crushes. The feeling of inadequacy seeps in, trying to justify and prevent romance from every happening between pairs of very qualified people.
Not only do you have to encourage and edify the body, but at moment’s time take a step back and look at the mighty works that God does in your life. God moves inside of each one of us in so many awesome ways. Sometimes, we tend to forget that when God is moving on other people marvelously, He is also doing a mighty work in us, whether we believe it or not.
What are your thoughts?
In these moments, I ponder again and again why God moves the way he does. I picture God to be perfect and flawless. Once again, those are attributes of God. In these realizations, I do not want to taint or mess up anything about my perfect Father and King. Whether the task maybe doing ministry in church or trying to explain how awesome He is to people, I am worried and scared that I’m not the “right” person for the job and that I will screw up.
I grew up as a clutz. I remember the times when I would drop food everywhere and have people scream to me on how unreliable I was. I had people belittle me constantly saying that I did not hold up to some certain standard whether it was following in the footsteps of my brother or failing to meet expectations in general.
God’s funny sometimes. I have to constantly be reminded by Him that my failures are okay. In scripture, He says that He is actually made strong in my weakness and that we are a working masterpiece.
I write this to not get pity; rather I wonder if this mindset of inadequacy seeps into how we view members of the opposite sex within Passion Church (PC). Overall, I feel a strong sense of admiration towards everyone in PC. Never before have I seen a group of people who are so passionate for the Lord. I have learned much about many aspects of our Father through PC. With the women of PC, I have a strong sense of respect. They have valued the Lord so much in their life, choosing Him as their first love. I’m not saying that PC people are perfect, but they sure are amazing.
Anyway, I wonder if when a person does have feelings of love/romance towards the other gender, then feelings of inadequacy come in, preventing a person from pursuing his or her crush.
“I want to date her, but I’m not good enough”
Okay, maybe a person might not outright say that. Let’s change it
“I want to date her, but I’m not ready to date her. Her priority is with God. I do not want to screw up her relationship with God. She is so awesome and talented too, but I’m worried that I might distract her from her relationship with God.”
This is more subtly said in the minds of PC people (in my opinion). I think one of the reasons people don’t want to date is because of the fear that they are not good enough for their crushes. The feeling of inadequacy seeps in, trying to justify and prevent romance from every happening between pairs of very qualified people.
Not only do you have to encourage and edify the body, but at moment’s time take a step back and look at the mighty works that God does in your life. God moves inside of each one of us in so many awesome ways. Sometimes, we tend to forget that when God is moving on other people marvelously, He is also doing a mighty work in us, whether we believe it or not.
What are your thoughts?
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